Published: 26 February 2024
The following is a self-interview I have written to shed light on the often misunderstood world of migraines. My intention is to share my personal journey with the hope that it may resonate with others facing similar challenges.
Q: When did you realize you were suffering with migraines?
A: I was diagnosed a little over 3 years ago. My first symptoms appeared a few weeks after I started a new job. This was actually my first job out of university so I was excited to finally start building a life for myself.
Prior to my diagnosis, I had noticed heat and stiffness building up in the back of my neck, and pressure behind my left eye. When I was working, my eyes often felt warm and heavy. At the time, I thought I was experiencing eyestrain from being in front of the computer for too long. But that quickly escalated. It became a real concern when I was confronted with really painful headaches for hours on end. I’m talking 6 to 8 hours of throbbing pain in the head almost every single day.
During the weekends, I would simply retreat to a quiet and dark room to sleep it off but it became a challenge during the weekdays. Sometimes the pain was so intense that I would take over-the-counter painkillers and splash cold water on my face multiple times a day to help ease the pain.
One day, I ended up going to the hospital because the pain was so unbearable. The whole time I was there, I kept thinking something was gravely wrong with me. It was a really scary moment for me. I was sent back home with stronger painkillers and a spot on a waiting list for an MRI. Fortunately, a couple of weeks later, I finally got an appointment. When the results came back, I was relieved to learn that there were no signs of tumours or abnormalities in my brain. That’s when my doctor diagnosed me with chronic migraines.
Q: What do your migraines feel like?
A: It’s a combination of brain fog and an intense pressure in my head. It really feels like your head is going to explode. I often compare the feeling to a computer that is over-heating. The back of my neck starts to heat up really quickly and my thoughts start to slow down. It becomes very difficult to focus on anything other than the discomfort that I am feeling. At that point, I usually retreat to a quiet and dark room (if I can) because I get really sensitive to sound and light.
Q: Do you know what caused your migraines in the first place?
A: Not really. I’ve received so many mixed opinions that I really don’t know anymore. I wouldn’t be surprised if there is a genetic component to it because some family members have experienced similar things. I’ve also been told that hormonal changes and lifestyle choices can play a big role in the severity of migraine episodes.
I did realize something a couple of months ago. This is purely anecdotal but I believe that my migraines are somehow linked to my IBS. Years before developing migraines, I remember talking to an ER doctor in Paris about my IBS and he had mentioned that the pain in my abdomen could eventually be expressed elsewhere in my body. At the time, I wasn’t sure what he meant, but looking back on it now, it really makes me wonder. I do notice that when I have a migraine, I don’t have stomach pains and vice versa. Both conditions also seem to share similar triggers. But who knows? They might just be co-morbidities. I can’t tell for sure. That being said, I do know that there are many published studies that suggest that IBS patients are more likely to experience migraines.
Q: How long do your migraines last?
A: It really depends. I’ve had migraines that lasted an hour or two and others that stretched over a couple of days. Those are the worst. They are physically and psychologically draining and very difficult to explain to an employer. It’s really frustrating for both parties.
Q: What’s the hardest part for you?
A: Definitely learning to manage chronic pain. I’ve had some very dark days. When you feel pain on a regular basis, it really starts to play with your head. It strips you of your defences and forces you to look at yourself in a very humble way.
Q: Have you tried any medical treatments?
A: To my knowledge, there is no cure for chronic migraines. There are only treatments that allow you to alleviate the pain once a migraine shows up. I was surprised to learn that modern science barely understands the origins of this neurological disorder.
At the beginning of my diagnosis, I was prescribed some very strong pain killers to take when I would feel a migraine coming on. I tried it maybe twice and was a little bit concerned by the instant shift in mood it would give me. I would go from feeling unsettled and tense to ecstatic and invigorated. It felt too good to be true and I noticed a bunch of possible side effects that got me worried. Not to mention those pills were extremely expensive. It was unfathomable for me to rely on them long-term.
Q: How have people reacted to your migraines?
A: I was very lucky to have understanding people who truly tried to sympathize with my situation. I am very thankful for my family’s continual support. They have never made me feel like I was burdening them. That being said, we live in a fast-paced society that is merciless to people experiencing any sort of chronic pain. It’s really isolating and for a long time, it left me feeling very depressed and frustrated. Migraines are a very common neurological disorder and yet, I found myself almost ashamed to be diagnosed with it because I felt like I couldn’t keep up with others’ expectations of me and that made me feel so unworthy.
Q: How do you relieve your migraines? Any go-to migraine hacks?
A: I do have a couple of coping strategies that I rely on:
- One of my favourite ones is the cold compress on the back of the neck, over the eyes and on the forehead. I find this to be especially effective at the beginning stages of a migraine. For this, I use hot-cold eye masks that I bought on Amazon. I just leave them in a ziploc bag in the freezer and take them out when needed.
- This one might sound strange but it has been a life-saver for me on multiple occasions. I like to eat a water-based popsicle to help dissipate some of the heat released during a migraine attack. Letting ice cubes melt in your mouth also has the same effect. I found that lowering my body temperature does wonders to halt oncoming migraines. I will often make sure I get rid of any extra layers of clothing for optimal results. Sometimes, I will even rinse my hair with cold water for a couple of minutes. If it’s wintertime, standing in front of an open window and breathing in fresh air for a couple of minutes also helps a lot.
- For the stiffness, I like to take a hot shower to help relax the muscles on the back of my neck. If the migraine is severe, I will go as far as taking a shower or bath with the lights off to allow my eyes to relax completely.
- Once I’ve completed some (if not all) of these steps, I will look for a dark and quiet room to rest in for a couple of minutes. If I need to work on the computer, I will wear sunglasses to help relieve some the eyestrain I am feeling. I also try to incorporate stretches to my everyday routine especially if I’m working in front of a computer screen all day.
- If I’m still struggling, I will take a few sips of a caffeinated drink and keep ice cold water nearby to sip on throughout the day.
- Sometimes, I will chew gum especially if my migraine was triggered by a food item.
- Another thing I do to release tension is self-massaging my head, the back of my neck and my face (especially between my eyes and my temples).
- If my eyes get really warm, I like using cotton pads soaked with orange blossom water. Orange blossom water is really inexpensive if you buy it from an ethnic market. I keep the bottle in the fridge so it’s chilled when I need it. I also find that the smell of orange blossom can be very soothing and help to relieve some of the tension I am feeling.
- If all else fails, I will take over-the-counter painkillers and (if the situation allows it) take a nap for at least 30 minutes .
I find that writing down these tricks on a piece of paper beforehand is really helpful because, once the pain hits, it becomes very hard to focus.
On an everyday basis, I also try to get enough sleep, avoid skipping meals and find physical activities that I enjoy.
Q: Have you figured out what your main triggers are?
A: Hormonal changes are one of my main triggers. I always get a migraine right before my period. To avoid tensing up, I will use a hot pack on my tummy to help keep the pain under control and avoid unnecessary discomfort.
I also get triggered by sensory overload especially when I am facing direct sunlight for too long or being exposed to persistent loud noises.
Some foods also seem to increase the frequency and intensity of my migraines.
Q: Are there any foods you try to limit or avoid completely because of your migraines?
A: Yes. I definitely keep an eye on the amount of fatty foods that I eat. Things like nuts, peanut butter, fried foods, chocolates and custards can easily trigger me.
Diary products also seem to be a big trigger, especially milk and aged cheeses. I do enjoy a yogurt every once in a while but I try to avoid milk completely because it really messes with my digestive system and, when my stomach is unhappy, it seems more likely for me to get migraines.
To help manage my migraines, I’ve also been watching out for triggers related to my IBS. Things like spicy food, acidic foods (like citrus fruits and canned tomato sauce), raw garlic and onions. I take probiotics as well and, of course, I try to keep my stress levels in check. Stress just makes everything worse.
Q: What are some of your favourite ways to relieve stress?
A: I love to go on long walks in natural settings. Some of my favourite places are forests and seasides. These walks always remind me of all the beautiful and effortless things that we are blessed with everyday. I love to take pictures of the animals and bugs that I encounter along the way. It’s really fun for me and I know that I will remember good feelings when I look back at those pictures. If I’m in a city, I will just wander around, exploring new streets and places. I love getting lost in a familiar setting.
If I am feeling very overwhelmed and introverted, I will write down my thoughts or record an audio diary entry on my voice-memos on my phone. I also enjoy watching fun, feel-good and creative content on Netflix or Youtube to help me unwind and find some new inspiration.
Having a morning routine also helps to start the day on the right foot. Whether it be 10 or 60 minutes long, I like to spend that time doing things that make me feel good and excited for the day. Looking out the window and breathing in some fresh air, doing a couple of stretches and enjoying the process of getting dressed in the morning are all small things that can easily boost my mood. But the most healing part of my mornings is by far my spiritual practice because it gives me a deep sense of peace and purpose. It’s comforting and energising at the same time.
Q: What is something you learned about migraines that people might not know about?
A: There are migraines with and without auras. Auras are basically sensory disturbances that usually appear just before a migraine attack and can affect hearing, vision or ability to speak. In my case, more often than not, they are visual. I see a bunch of bright blue sparks appear out of nowhere. They are really pretty to look at but, to be honest, the first time it happened, it really freaked me out. I thought I was having some sort of stroke.
Q: How can someone help a person struggling with a migraine attack?
A: Just being there for them in enough, whether that means bringing them something they need, listening to them or simply giving them their space. I think this applies to most struggles in life. When someone is going through hard times, it really helps to know that there are people who truly care about you and give you the time you need to get better without judgment. Patience and understanding are truly invaluable.
Personally, when I’m in the middle of a migraine, things like loud noises and bright lights are very hard to deal with so it helps to have someone who is aware of that.
Q: What advice would you give to someone who is experiencing the same thing?
A: Be patient with yourself and find trustworthy people to talk to. I think, as humans, we sometimes try to brave difficult situations alone to convince ourselves that we are completely self-reliant. But we are not meant to carry burdens alone. These hardships can eat at us and leave us feeling empty and completely disconnected from others. The right people don’t always appear right away and that’s okay. I truly believe that everything happens when the time is right. Trusting that process is extremely liberating.
Q: Did anything good come out of this experience?
A: I believe so. It’s not just the migraines though. It’s human struggles in general. I think the experiences that shape us the most in life are the ones we don’t choose. I try to remind myself that this pain does not define me. It says nothing about me as a person or my worth. I try to make the best of every situation and learn to accept the things that can‘t be changed.
It can be scary to re-evaluate your life but you also get to discover a whole new sense of self. There is something about pain that accelerates human growth on a deeper level. You get to see things with a fresh perspective and learn to embrace the unseen parts of people. The reality is that no one leaves this earth without a collection of scars. The only difference is that some scars remain out of sight.
